One day, while in my MAPP classes, the message of establishing traditions with the children I would adopt caused my mind to wander. As the facilitator continued the training, I pondered what traditions would be established in our home. Considering I was single, with no other children, I was open to setting new traditions - introducing a formal past to an informal present. The subject was briefly referred to during the training, but it echoed vividly in my mind as the session continued. I decided this was going to be an important part of building a family unity.

Tonia, 13, and Maranda, 12, were placed in my home in October 2001 in time for the holidays. As November approached, I began to think of a tradition we could establish for Thanksgiving. For some reason, I got into the Christmas spirit early. The day before Thanksgiving we went to the store to pick out a new Christmas tree - pre-lit with snowy white branches. That evening, while I started the Thanksgiving dinner, the children and several friends and family from out of town put the tree together.

Little did I know this moment would become the first snapshot in our new album of family traditions. Since that time we pride ourselves on being the first family in the neighborhood to put up a Christmas tree. Still snowy white! Still pre-lit!

This began our somewhat strange annual kickoff to celebrating Thanksgiving.

One night in mid-December we were watching TV by the fireplace in our flannel pajamas. Suddenly, I asked the girls if they wanted to go for a ride to look at Christmas lights around the city. No one wanted to get dressed, so we kept our pjs on, made hot chocolate, grabbed the dogs, and hopped in the van. We played Christmas music the entire time we rode through an upscale neighborhood viewing the lights in amazement. Sounds simple, but frankly it was the most fun we had shared since becoming a family. Every year since then they ask if we can do it again - the same way - pjs, hot chocolate, the dogs, and of course, Christmas music. I must admit I never thought about that as a family tradition. I suppose that's what makes traditions so special. They're your family's unique moment all to themselves.

Since that unforgettable moment two more children have joined our family; Samantha, 13, and DeLisa, 12. Now our all-time favorite tradition occurs on Christmas day. Every Christmas, when the girls open their gifts, they know that one gift will be hidden away. They nicely urge me to hurry up with my gifts, because I have not mastered the art of videotaping and opening presents at the same time. After I open mine, they quickly give me back the recorder so I can tape them searching for their hidden treasure. One year they found electric scooters. Before I could say anything they were outside riding them in their pajamas. Now that was a sight.

To me a tradition doesn't always have to be an annual activity. We have started the daily tradition of saying grace and reciting a Bible scripture - we learn a new one every week - before each meal. There is also the tradition that no one leaves the kitchen after dinner until it is clean.

On Saturday mornings we all get up, eat breakfast, put on some music and clean the house; from top to bottom. Recently, Maranda was given a school assignment to write about the things she most wanted to do with her future family - something that she currently does with her family today. Oddly enough, she stated that she wanted her family to clean the house together every week.

I had no idea how much this meant to her, although I'm almost positive cleaning had little to do with it. However, the fact that the family worked together to finish a task meant a lot to her. Sounds like a tradition to me.

Having four adolescent girls, two dogs, two ferrets and two gerbils can often be "lively" at times - borderline chaotic.

However, traditionally speaking the treasured moments that bring the family together as a unit create fond memories for all of us. They're truly something we can cherish for a lifetime!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Dawn L. Cooper is a single adoptive mother of four special needs children. Cooper is co-founder of the Indiana Post Adoption Network and currently serves as the administrative director. She has a bachelor of science degree in business management from Indiana Wesleyan University.