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 | Our Adoption Journey
by Monica C. Gyves |
Our story of adoption begins, as I’m sure others do, after many years of unsuccessful infertility treatments, which lead to a difficult question. Do we continue riding on the infertility roller coaster or do we pursue adoption? After six long years filled with frustration and disappointment, we decided that enough was enough and proceeded to find out all that we could about adoption. We purchased books, visited various agencies and “surfed the net.” It was on the Internet that we found our agency, New Beginnings Children’s and Families Services.
We chose the Russian program offered by New Beginnings for several reasons. We were aware of the program’s great success in placing children who were clearly very well cared for by their caretakers. We were also told that the Russian program moved very quickly, which meant that we would have the family we had always dreamed of within months rather than years, as was the case with the other domestic and international programs.
On September 6, 2001, our journey began with a nine-hour flight to Moscow, followed by another 10-hour flight further east to the city of Yuzhno-Sakhalinsk, located north of Japan on the eastern coast of Russia. As the hours passed our excitement increased as we tried to imagine what it would be like when we first met our new son or daughter. We were exhausted when we landed and had only 15 minutes to drop off our bags at the hotel before jumping into a taxi for the short ride to the Babies Home, the orphanage in Yuzhno-Sakhalinsk.
As each of the four couples in our traveling group stood waiting outside the orphanage, you could literally feel the excitement and anxiety as we waited to meet our children for the first time. We experienced the entire spectrum of emotions during the short wait — fear, joy, excitement and anxiety.
When we were finally brought upstairs to meet our son Jack Thomas for the first time, we were elated. He was a beautiful little blonde haired, blue-eyed boy who stole our hearts immediately. Throughout the course of the week, we traveled from our hotel to the Babies Home for morning and afternoon visits with Jack. Little by little, he grew more accustomed to our presence, and we began to bond with him in a way that was truly special. His mad dashes into our arms as he spotted us entering the room brought tears of joy to our eyes.
It was abundantly clear that the children received excellent care at the orphanage. Whenever Jack’s caretaker, Valentina, came into the room, his eyes were focused only on her. We have a great picture of her holding Jack. You wouldn’t believe the smile on his face!
It was midway through our stay in Russia that the terrorist attack of September 11th occurred. Once again we were amazed at the kindness demonstrated by our Russian hosts. The caretakers at the orphanage all extended their deepest sympathies to each of us, as did the staff at the hotel. After leaving Jack for our return flight to Moscow we witnessed the kindness of the people of Russia as they left flowers, notes and mementos along the entire length of the United States Embassy.
Six weeks later we returned to Russia to bring Jack home. Two long flights later we arrived at John F. Kennedy Airport to be greeted by our families waving flowers and balloons. Finally, we were a family. Finally we were home. In the year and a half that has passed since our return, we now realize just how lucky we are to have Jack in our lives. He is happy, healthy and loves his new home. He has become a source of joy for both of our families, and our neighbors as well. He is without doubt the greatest gift we could ever have asked for.
Monica Gyves lives in Baldwin, New York with her husband, Thomas, and son, Jack. Monica is a registered nurse who works in the surgical unit at Winthrop University Hospital. Thomas is currently a professor of engineering at SUNY Maritime College and also is an engineering consultant for the Dormitory Authority of New York. Monica and Tom have been married for 12 years. In November 2001 a baby boy, Jack, was brought into their lives.
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